Valiant and Courageous

     This morning I received an email from my Aunt Bobbie explaining the meaning of Riley's name.  I'm guessing from the title of this entry you may have figured it out.  Valiant and courageous definitely describes our little man.  Valiant is basically a synonym for the word courageous.  We believe in our hearts that Riley will live up to his name and show us daily what it means to be courageous.
     Today was a great day, but kind of an off day too.  Not because of Riley's health or progress, but for other reasons.  First, I woke up in a lot of pain which I haven't had in a few days.  I decided quickly this is the devil trying to bring me down and doing anything he can to disrupt my faith in God and our growing relationship.  I immediately told the devil to leave my body and that he would not prevent me from healing and taking care of my son who will need me.  I prayed for healing and for God to take the pain away.  Before Riley's birth, I probably would have complained about the pain and asked someone to find me pain pills immediately.  Don't get me wrong, I took the pills this morning, but it comforted me to cast out the devil and ask God for help as well.  I think most of us go to God and ask for whatever it is we need help with, but I think maybe we forget who is trying to cause us pain and interrupt our lives.  Next time you are in pain, emotionally, physically, mentally, whatever, try yelling at the devil to stop messing with you!  Stand on the name of Jesus and cast him out. 
     Once we got to the hospital, the devil was continuing to try and effect us through other means.  The Nicu is a very secure place.  When you arrive at the door, you must call the front desk and state who you are there to see.   Then they call the nurse and make sure it is okay to let you inside.  Normally, this process takes a matter of seconds, but today almost every time we went to see him, we could not get in.  "Ten more minutes please", we were told each time.  Ten minutes would turn into 20 minutes, sometimes longer.  It's a long way from the hospital entrance to the Nicu, lots of turns and an elevator ride.  Right now, I am too weak to walk all that way so Craig has to wheel me there.  As I take the ride to the Nicu, I have a rush of emotions.  I feel anxious, excited, happy, and relieved.  To have all those emotions built up and to be told you can't come in and see your son right away is heartbreaking.  It was a little too much today and by the third time, we were very frustrated.  They had good reasons to make us wait, running lots of tests which I'll explain in a minute but it's still hard to wait.  One of the times, I just thanked God for teaching me patience, trying not to let it effect me too much.  The devil does not give up, he will continually come after you, it is a constant struggle but God has defeated him and will continue to defeat him as you call out to him.
     Riley had a big day today, starting with a head ultrasound this morning to check for bleeding in the brain.  Dr. Gee called us before we got to the hospital and gave us the results.  He has a Grade 1, possibly Grade 2 bleed, out of 4 grade levels, 4 being the highest.  It is our understanding that in most cases the blood from a Grade 1 bleed is absorbed back into the body and is not a huge concern.  They did find fluid in the ventricles of his brain so a neurologist will be talking to us about that soon.  Shortly after the head ultrasound, he had a GI ultrasound to check on his liver.  There is a certain level, bilirubin, that was a little high on his last test and Dr. Gee wanted to check it out.  A GI doctor told us that this is most likely proteins and blood leftover from when they put the central line in yesterday and took out the lines in his belly.  Also, he has had many blood transfusions so it will take him time to break all that down.  All in all, the Dr. is not immediately concerned but Riley will be tested bi-weekly just to follow up on his levels. 
     At lunch time, Riley had an Eco done on his heart.  We were actually standing behind the tech while she did this, but are obviously not doctors so I had no idea what to look for, I just knew that his little heart was beating.  Later tonight, we learned that the anatomy of his heart is all there and it is working well.  He does have pulmonary hypertension, but they are watching it closely and will continue to monitor it but overall the heart looks great. 
     The best thing to happen today was we got to make eye contact with Riley!  Our last visit of the day, he opened up his little left eye and looked around at his mommy and daddy who are so proud of him.  I started crying almost immediately.  To look into his eye and know that he's mine is an awesome feeling.  To see him move his eye from side to side looking at Craig and I, his parents, really made me feel like we were a family.  Another small victory achieved!

I will leave you with this scripture:  1 Peter 4:8-11 "⁸ Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. ⁹ Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.
 ¹⁰ And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. ¹¹ To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen."