Riley's Birthday from my perspective

    Before I start telling the story, I'll update you on Riley.  He had another great day.  He made his first poopy diaper with no medicinal assistance.  We learned this on our daily morning phone call.  I must be honest, I was actually sad that I was not there to witness it.  I heard it looks like tar, I'm sure he'll be given me plenty of poopy diapers in the future.  He's been off dopamine for 24 hours now and hasn't had a blood transfusion or platelets in over 24 hours.  These are all wonderful accomplishments and we praise God that we continue to only receive good reports from the doctors and nurses. 
    
    Wednesday, January 11 started out a normal day.  I went to work and the bell rang for first period.  We begin Wednesdays with mental math warm-ups so I was walking around giving directions to the students.  During this time, I started to feel pain in my lower rib cage on my left side.  I have had pain similar to this before and it was just gas so I was trying to ignore it and continue teaching.  The pain continued to get worse, I tried to sit down in different positions, stand up against the wall, walk around, nothing was alleviating the pain.  Luckily, I have a co-teacher 1st period so I decided to go to the nurse just to lay down for a bit.  I was there about 10 minutes or so and was talking to my instructional coach when she and the nurse suggested I called my doctor.  The nurse at the doctor's office asked me a few questions, reported to Dr. Lloyd and told me to come in at 1:30 pm.  I left school immediately after the phone call and went home to rest.  I really thought it was just bad gas and that it would eventually subside. 
   My Nanny and Papa were able to take me to the doctor and we arrived promptly at 1:30.  One of my good friends, Maryssa, actually walked in right behind me with her new baby.  She asked me if everything was okay and I think I said something like, "I don't think so".  The first thing the nurse did was check Riley's heartbeat and his heart was beating in the normal range so that gave me a sigh of relief.  She also took my blood pressure, which was kind of high, but not too bad. Dr. Lloyd came in shortly after the nurse left and asked me questions like, where was the pain, how long have you had this, have you had any headaches lately, etc.   Based on my answers, he said I was to go to the hospital directly to labor and delivery.  He then said 1 of 3 things could happen.  I could just need to rest and stay there for a little while, or I might stay there for a few days, or I could have a baby today.  When he said the last option, I actually laughed and said, "okay". 
   The hospital is about 45 minutes away from the Kingwood office where I saw Dr. Lloyd so of course I was looking on my iphone researching my symptoms and what could be happening to me.  My diagnosis was pre eclampsia.  I had most all the symptoms listed on the website.  I also called my husband on the drive downtown to let him know the situation.  I tried to sound calm and not too worried.
   When we arrived at the hospital, they put two straps on my belly.  One was to observe contractions and I think the other was the fetal monitor.  It's all a little hazy.  The nurse said she could see my baby and that he looked good.  She told me later on that she lied to me because my Nanny and Papa were in the room and she didn't want to upset them.  Nice.  What shocked me was when she told me I was having contractions every 1 to 3 minutes.  I NEVER considered I was having contractions.  I thought contraction pain was supposed to be down low, my pain was by my ribs.  This is the point where the events become a little unclear.  I'm pretty sure I went into shock after she told me I was having contractions. 
    They gave me medicine to stop the contractions, which was difficult due to the fact that I was severley dehydrated.  I was so worried about the baby that I didn't drink anything for several hours.  The medicine was starting to work so that gave me some hope.  During this time, Craig arrived and I immediately felt better. 
    Dr. Lloyd came in the room and told Craig and I they wanted a high risk doctor to do an ultrasound on the baby just to check everything out.  I did not like the sound of that, but kept telling myself I heard his heartbeat and it was still beating so he had to be fine.
   They rolled me to the ultrasound room and the high risk doctor put the cold stuff on my belly and began.  Immediatley, he said, "something's wrong".  Not a good start.  I remember him repeating over and over, "I don't know why this baby is doing this".  He told Dr. Lloyd, "look at the swelling, look at the stomach, look at the head".  Apparently, Riley was measuring different weeks on different parts of his body due to the amount of swelling.  He kept asking how far along I was, you could tell he was confused.  Dr. Lloyd and the high risk doctor talked for what seemed like forever only to each other discussing the baby and myself.  Then the high risk doctor said the word "hydrops".  When he said this word, you could physically see Dr. Lloyd's shoulders drop and he got real quiet.  My nurse put her head down and squeezed my arm.  Of course, Craig and I had no idea what hydrops was or what was happening.  He said the baby is retaining an excessive amount of fluid and that his was a mirror syndrome so now I was retaing fluid as well.  The placenta was massive. 
     The high risk doctor said we had to terminate the pregnancy that night because now the most important thing was my health, like the baby was gone and didn't matter anymore.  All I kept thinking was, I can see his heartbeat, I can see his heartbeat, he's alive, what is happening.  Craig asked what our options were since they decided I must deliver immediatley.  The high risk doctor said we could induce labor and since this was my first pregnancy and I'm barely dilated, it could take hours and we would most certainly have a stillborn.  I think after he spoke those words I checked myself out mentally and emotionally.  This was a nightmare that I wanted to wake up from so badly but couldn't. 
    The other option was to have a c-section and the doctor said and I quote "the chances are one in a million" that Riley would make it through delivery.  So you're saying there's a chance.  Again, I was checked out so I remember these words but I was numb so didn't really react to them.  Craig did all the talking.  We decided on the c-section and waited for labs about my platelet count to see if I could have an epidural or would need to be under general anesthetic.  Labs came back and I had to be put all the way under because my platelets were really low and they had some major concerns trying to do an epidural.  So now, not only do I have to give birth to a baby that has a slim chance to live, but my husband can't even be in the room with me.  To be honest, this was way more difficult for him than me.  I'll let him tell you about it sometime. 
    From the point where it was decided I must deliver to when I was actually rolled into the operating room must have been hours.  I lost track of time.  Craig stayed with me until they took me into surgery, we had a lot of family in the waiting room but I did not want anyone with me but my husband.  When Craig and I decided that he should go tell everyone what was going on and I was by myself for a few minutes, I felt this sense of peace and energy around me.  I knew he was out there with our family praying.  I became very calm and just tried to focus on the positive energy. 
    Once, I was in the operating room they told me something about how they had to do things a little differnet with me and prep me all first before they put me under.  Things like put the cathedar in, which as you can imagine was such a great experience!  Anyway, the next thing I remember is waking up and seeing Craig.  He told me Riley was in nicu and the doctors were working on him.  I didn't really comprehend this at all, I just knew I was awake and my husband was in front of me.  The day ended by me checking into an ICU room and visiting with my family.  Not sure what was said, but I know they were there. 
    That was a rough day but also the greatest day because I gave birth to my son who is alive and doing well thanks to Our Father, God Almighty.  I feel so blessed to be Riley's mother.  He is an angel here on earth and will continue to bless me and others.  I hope his story has blessed many of you already and will do so in the future.  ¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11, NKJV)

I wanted to leave you with a request.  As you know, my son is eating now.  I have been pumping since day 4 or 5 and it seemed to increase a few days ago but now has slacked off.  They are running out of my breast milk and I ask that you pray that God help me provide nourishment for my son.  I can only do so much for him right now and I want to provide his food so badly.  I know that God will hear our prayers and I will be filling up those bottles in no time!